It's not that I necessarily mind the driver Maryam has at the shop. His name is Konstantine. He's Russian. He's a really nice older man. He and his wife moved from Russia about 6 years ago; there, he was an accomplished conductor of an orchestra, here, he delivers flowers. Most of the time he comes and goes and its not a problem. Most of the time, I just hand him the delivery confirmation sheets and his directions and off he goes. Most of the time he amuses me with the manner in which he speaks.
But sometimes.
SOMETIMES he just gets on my nerves.
Like when I've been too busy to make his delivery confirmation sheet and I start to do it right as he comes in. Then, he stands by my side as I'm looking up directions and making the forms and he stares at me and then the computer screen and then at me and then at the computer screen. But then, what's more. Yes, there's more. He starts to tap his fingers on the counter in impatience. Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap. And I start getting distracted and I start to make spelling mistakes which takes more time which makes him even more impatient. Finally, I hand them over and he struts away, looking annoyed.
Something else that gets on my nerves? Oh yeah. The fact that he wont listen to anyone but Maryam about certain things. Sometimes when I'm on the phone with another customer he calls and says...no SCREAMS, "YES HELLO IS KONSTANTINE. ASK MISS MARYAM PLEASE IF I LEAVE BY DOOR THE FLOWERS."
To which I reply, "YES KONSTANTINE IS OK IF YOU LEAVE ON DOOR."
Which prompts the response of, "NO ASK MISS MARYAM IF OK IF I LEAVE ON DOOR."
After which, I put the phone on my chest, wait about 7 seconds, then reply, " YES KONSTANTINE, MISS MARYAM SAYS YES IS OK."
Thank you. You're welcome. GOODBYE.
I have had to learn to speak in a way that he understands what I'm saying. For instance, I have to shorten my sentences to the point where I still tell him what I need to tell him, but with the least words possible. Otherwise, he FEIGNS comprehension, but really, it's going right over his head.
"KONSTANTINE, TAKE FLOWERS TO HOUSE, COME BACK, TAKE BOXES TRASH"
Also, he always says, "Youre welcome." Before I've had the chance to say, "Thank you."
He hands me back the delivery confirmation sheets and says, "Yes, you're welcome." And then runs off again and leaves me sitting there yelling "thank you" to his back.
He calls his clipboard his desk. "YES. I LEAVE DESK HERE. I HAVE TO MY PAPERS ON IT. YES. YES. I COME BACK."
But then. But then I think about the life he left behind in Russia. I think about who he was there, and who he is here. I think about the thoughts running through his head as he delivers the flowers. If he ever regrets moving to the United States. I wonder if I get on his nerves.
So then I'm nice to him.
Yes. Konstantine. Is Ok.
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